We go to school at an early age to learn things we don’t know. This education could be high school, trade school and for others an undergraduate or post-graduate degree. Regardless, after 12 – 13 years (at a minimum), we learned something about writing, reading, math, science and history. Others are lucky and were a good athlete, musician or artist.
But with all this schooling, at any given time no one says to us Hold on now, it is time for you to take one more class on Parenting Skills
You might be luck if your high school health class gave you a “pretend baby” with so you learned how to care for another person and how much responsibility it takes. The underlining message beneath that experience was/is to derail you from getting pregnant (boys or girls).
But once again, nothing about Parenting ….
Many descriptors come to mind when I think of Parenting:
- Raising a Child
- Taking Care of Someone
- The Care of a Child
- Provide Love, Education and Guidance to a Younger Person Under Our Care
But once again, where is the class, the program or education for us before becoming a parent?
In my case, my only experience was in my home by my parents and older sister. They were the ones who influenced me. They instilled in me my values and beliefs. But, I really didn’t know that much until I had my first child. I even remember thinking “when I become a parent, I will do …. or it will be my way”.
It was trial and error.
Every single day, 24 hours, 7 days a week until this person grows up, becomes an adult, moves out and may or may not become a parent himself. And even now, I’m still a parent.
Did I have the skill set, training or education to understand my child or his developmental stages? “Not at all”
Again, it was trial and error. After many years in my professional career and training hours in different parenting programs, I found one that makes sense.
In Calm and Connected: Parenting Children with ADHD Parent Training and Support, we teach parents how to use the collaborative problem solving method with their children, adolescents and young adults. This method also works with adults and couples to help them communicate more effectively with their children.